Living is a whole new adventure when you suddenly find yourself alone, widowed and the mother of four young boys a lot like their Dad.
Grateful He’s Gone
Feeling Grateful I’m here. As I held one of my children, I felt a new sense of gratitude. The kind of gratitude that one can feel in the presence of a new perspective with an old thought. I held my boy and realized how much I loved holding him and how much I would miss him had I been the one to have died.
I Finally Took Off My Wedding Ring
Both of our wedding rings sit in a box under my bathroom counter by the lotion, the sunscreen and the mouthwash. When my husband died, I looked at my left hand with the ring on it. I’ll never take this off, I thought. I’m still married. After 2 months of doing his jobs and mine and grieving it all; I looked at my left hand and the ring on it and thought, he’s not here, this is a lie.
One Dirty Shirt Left
Right after Grant died, I realized he, as in his body, would not be around to smell wonderful or terrible anymore. I found myself frantically going through the laundry to see if I could find any clothes that still smelled like him. I needed a shirt or something that still smelled like him. Damn! I was too efficient with the laundry.
