Living is a whole new adventure when you suddenly find yourself alone, widowed and the mother of four young boys a lot like their Dad.
When Your Life Feels Stable
My home is my beautiful and safe space where my heart is. The stairs of my home are like the portal to the different parts of my home with different meanings for life. Every step down, one after the other, my feet are met with stair after stair until I reach the bottom.
Running Away Again
I had no idea where he was. It was late. He had no intention of coming back. He left me. He ran away, sneaky little guy. He’s 11 and gone. He thought he had us all fooled and he thought could get away from his life. I know that feeling, wanting to run, to get away from my life.
Now Is My New Home
For too long I was looking for a home that doesn’t exist here. It’s the place where Grant is now. I had been alive, but longing to be somewhere else. A place I thought to be better than here. What I didn’t realize was how much of here I was missing, longing to be there. Now I see what I missed. I see it fully now, because part of it is lost to me. That’s a hard lesson to see what you had, only when it’s taken from you.
It’s So Good To Be Home
About 4 weeks before Grant died, he’d gotten into buying home décor for the new house. He loved those little decorative plaques with messages of cliché sayings. The ones that are true, and everybody knows them. They’re positive. When you see them, you think ahhh… yeah that’s so true. He bought several. Usually on a Walmart trip with the kids, so they weren't exactly designer quality, but they were really nice. I was impressed by the Walmart finds.
