Protected By A Partner
In what ways do women provide a protective space for their men? Of what women give to men, what ways do you men feel that in your relationships? Do you feel that protection in your relationships? In my relationship with my husband, I brought mostly feminine but a few masculine qualities.
He brought mostly masculine but a few feminine qualities into the relationship. The moment his masculine was taken from my world, it was a palatable feeling of that being gone and me being left. I felt exposed to the world without my protector.
What I have been thinking about is this. I am capable of doing the things that are required to survive in the world and that’s a huge blessing, but the flip side of that I have genuinely missed. The protection of a man in my world.
Now I can go out and do all the things that need to be done without the protection of a man; but having that missing element of a man protecting with his energy and with his presence has been a palatable difference in my world.
It got me thinking about what the protections are, that come with being in a relationship, even in what women provide to men. I can only speak to my experience in my relationship but I have truly come to see the value of the physical presence of that protection whether for a woman or of a man.
Its got me thinking, women have just as potent of a protective role in the lives of their man, you know. Particularly with my husband and I, I think of what my roles were in protecting him, maybe not from the world but as a man.
As I thought about that, I contemplated about creating that safe haven for his emotion and his heart. Having a place where he could come home and share the things that were so deep within his soul. Being so he could tell me about things and what he was needing.
I see that both genders truly benefit from and both provide protection for each other. I would love to hear your thoughts around this because again, I was just so taken aback by how potent that protection barrier felt the second it was gone.
I am wondering if anybody else feels that role in their relationships? I’m sitting outside here in my backyard with this issue that I am really only coming to terms with now, more than 4 years later. It reminds me how much I really miss and loved that protective role that my husband played in my life.
How real that truly was. From a spiritual perspective, there are still probably parts of him protecting me and the kids. In a physical level of reality with that physical presence being gone, it’s created such a dynamic in my life that it has caused me to really push myself into becoming a different person than I was before.
In some ways I’m stronger because I have had to be and in some ways more capable because I have had to be, but not because I wasn’t capable nor that those weren’t capabilities before. The dynamic of male/female bonding and protecting in a relationship, the back and forth and flowing in that way has been so interesting for me to live a life void of it.
When I had it for so long, but also to have had it instantly disappear, made it all the more stark. I would love to hear your thoughts, what your roles are, in those elements of protection that your partner plays in your life.
This goes beyond gender, like there are these roles we play for each other in the masculine energy and in the feminine energy. It's not exclusive to male/female relationships but that’s my experience so that’s from where I am sharing.
What is it like to feel it? And how does that play in a healthy relationship? Share with me your thots. I’m super curious to know if anybody is aware of this? Let me know, because for me at least I was less aware because it was so basically, naturally present for us.
Are there any of you more so than when I was in a relationship? Mine was with a really healthy wonderful beautiful masculine male. He held that for me. He held that space for me. What it was like then and what its been like to lose it has been profound.